Christina Hendricks is asking for it
A good old fashioned MOTORBOATIN’. Really, how the hell has no one done it already? I guarantee you that once it happens, she will be wearing turtle necks from then on out. Stay Black
Morning Wood for 8/30/010: Melissa Archer
Oh, who is Melissa Archer you say? Well, sit right down and I will fill you in. Truthfully, I have no idea who she is either but she is a big chested ginger, which is good enough for me and should be good enough for you too. Don’t like? Go scratch. Stay Black
@hippojuicemarie loves me.
In case you are not familiar with the Hippo Juice Podcast then shame on you. Royce and the crew do a pretty bang up job every week. One the members of the show is Marie. She was featured on Morning Wood back in June Well, apparently, she likes to send me pics of her hot legs and sweet buttocks. Bless her soul. Stay Black
@lindsaylohan just keeps getting hotter Part II
Really for all of her problems, this kid just keeps coming back. I want all of you to either leave her alone or be supportive of her since she doesn’t have the money for a bra to support her. Stay Black
Morning Wood for 8/30/010: Jessica Biel
How would have thought that the hot chick from “7th Heaven” would still be looking hot 10 years later? Me, because regardless of what happens to her, I follow the credo of “once hot, always hot”. Stay Black
Morning Wood for 8/24/010: Mary Louise Parker
I guess this is going to be MILF week. When I first heard of the show WEEDS, I had zero interest, a show about a single mom selling pot to support is kids is a story I hear every day living in Brooklyn BUT that all changed after I got a good look at its star, Mary Louise Parker. This chick has got it. Tight, little body, cute face, a smile that will burn away the clouds and a whole lot of...
Morning Wood for 8/23/010: Julianna Margulies
Some of the hottest women on the planet are not found at the strip joint around 5AM. Most of them are built like normal women but then when you look into their eyes, they just grab you. Mrs. Margulies is one of those women. She has the MILF next door look but her eyes tell a tale of nights filled with hot sex that will rock your socks.
Morning Wood for 8/20/010: Rachel Bilson
I guess this week’s theme was “girls next door” and I didn’t know it because if I did, I would have included Valerie Bertinelli, but instead you will get to look at the lovely, sweet and sexy Rachel Bilson. It wouldn’t be fair to me if I said she texted me last night asking to be today’s Woody but she did. Who am I to say no to a chick that can cook?
Daily 12 Seconds of Zen for 8/19/010
Morning Wood for 8/19/010: Mila Kunis
I am embarrassed to say that I have not had Mrs. Kunis featured here already. She should have been one of the firsts women to be part of “Morning Wood” but I digress. TV shows always have the girl next door that you just want to make out with and then watch a movie and hold her hand. Well, Mila is the hot bitch next door that you just want to bang and wake out on as soon as...
Morning Wood for 8/18/010: Courtney Cox
This chick is so hot that she even has cocks in her name. I lusted after Mrs. Cox from the first time I saw her as the girl friend of Alex P Keaton and she hasn’t let me down once since there.
August 13th 1995: The passing of Mantle
Was the day that the Big Commish in the Sky drafted the best power hitter, center fielder to ever wear the pin stripes. No I am not talking about no over rated, Jobber, fluffer like Bernie Williams, I mean Mickey Mantle. For me, Mantle could just hold your imagination to watch the game from beginning to end. He was a phenom before people even knew what the word meant. When he walked up...
Morning Wood for 8/16/010: Sofia Vergara
I enjoy a good TV show once in a while but the formula to having a great TV show: hot chicks. Modern Family is a show that would that would have been good BUT when you add the sexy Sofia Vergara to the cast, the show is a blockbuster. Stay Black
Because They're Nerds, Stupid (via @PassionMD)
You wonder why you get beat up? well, look at yourself on the evening news, fanboy. KICK ASS WASN’T REAL http://tv.gawker.com/5589104/nerdy-real-life-superheroes-to-keep-city-safe-from-bullies-jocks
Morning Wood for 8/13/010: Mischa Barton
Way, way, way back in the day (5 years ago) there was a show that took the world by storm and the female lead on the show was pegged to be the next huge thing in Hollywood. That show was THE OC and the chick was Mischa Barton. Neither are around today. Well, The OC is on TV in reruns I think and Mrs. Barton isnt really around though but thanks to low self esteem and a booze and drug...
Morning Wood for 8/12/010: Sophie Turner
Since I am a man of the world, I thought it only fitting that once in a while I showcase a woman from somewhere other than the good ol’ USA. So today you will be introduced to Australian swimsuit and fashion supermodel, Sophie Turner. You can thank me later, I know you are busy right now with certain rising issues. Stay Black
Morning Wood for 8/11/010: Kelly Brook
I am not exactly sure what it is that Mrs. Brook is famous for besides being hotter than the sun and when I figure it out, I will let you know but for now, just enjoy the photos. Stay Black
Morning Wood for 8/10/010: Mickie James
Every once in a while the WWE finds a woman that has it all: ability, charm, cuteness yet sexy and in there infinite intelligence they let those women go too soon. Mickie James is one of those women. Today, she has a country album out, which just adds to her sexiness for me. Stay Black
Morning Wood for 8/9/010: @AngiePontani
The art of Burlesque has provided entertainment for people all over the world for years now. Today there is a new generation of women taking up the mantle of BURLESQUE dancer and running with it. My favorite of these young women? Angie Pontani, Mrs Cyclone. Enjoy. Stay Black
Morning Wood for 8/6/10: Tamsen Fadal
Well today I give to you the other (not the 2nd) reason to watch WPIX channel 11’s morning news program here in NYC: Tamsen Fadal With her “Hot For Teacher” good lucks, she will get your morning off to a great start. Stay Black
Morning Wood for 6/29/10: Jill Nicolini
My morning news needs have been forever altered by WPIX in NYC for 2 reasons and one is Jill Nicolini and Tamsen Fadal (we will feature Mrs. Fadal tomorrow, don’t worry). Va Va Voom, no? Stay Black
Morning Wood for 8/4/10: Denise Milani
I had the pleasure of meeting this lovely young woman not too long and she insisted on being included on the morning wood. Who am I to refuse a lady? Stay Black
@Sn00ki All the makings of a lovely young lady
Tom Jones described her best when he said: Well she’s all you’d ever want She’s the kind they’d like to flaunt and take to dinner Well she always knows her place She’s got style, she’s got grace, she’s a winner. She’s a Lady. Whoa whoa whoa, she’s a Lady Talkin’ about that little Lady, and the Lady is mine. Well she’s never...
Morning Wood Submissions
Have a chick you want to see featured in the Morning Wood blog? Know a hot chick that wants to be in it? Send me the info and photos to email@example.com and i will share with the rest of us. Stay Black
Morning Wood for 8/3/10: Anna Paquin
She may very well be the hottest chick on TV right now. She took the role of “Sookie” on True Blood and made it all hers. She is sweet and nice but tough and sexy. Plus, from what I remember of our time together, she hates wearing clothes. Stay Black